When Grandfather greeted me first ... (a HSP blog)

My year 2022 did start a bit untypical. 

Well, on the second thought I have to admit it was completely predictable. As I was so excited for the New Year to start I tried to finish every open task during December. My goal for 2022 is to make it a "model-year". That´s why I allowed myself a last sloppy month in December. Means, I was eating completely unhealthy and I didn´t care about the money I spent or the packaging of stuff I bought. 

The result was the predictable part of the story:

On December 31st I was so tired and unwell I couldn´t prepare for "the Big Night" as I wished to do. I had a light but constant headache for the last couple of days - the result of too much sugar and chemical shit in my food and drinks. This headache and bad mood I carried over into the New Year. So it took me two days into the New Year to go cold turkey from all the shit I put into my mouth during the previous weeks.

The reason why I feel so unwell when I eat unhealthy is all the water my body is storing from my overly sugar, fat and salt consumption. That´s when my knees are badly hurting, my skin is grey and I feel as I gained 10 kg. At night I don´t sleep well, which leads to me being tired and unhappy all day long. 

 

Thank God I was so excited to start my "model-year"! 

So right from January 1st I started to eat and drink total natural and vegan. And yesterday, January 3rd, I was back on track. 

That´s the good side of it. It only takes a short time to correct my bad behavior. After two days cold turkey my body felt great again. I guess the stored water was gone by then. My headache was gone and I enjoyed my vegan meals to the fullest. It makes such a huge difference when I eat healthy and only when I am hungry. Every bite, every sip tastes like heaven and my body is cheering because it´s been treated so well! 

Yesterday, when I finished everything I wanted to do, I went for an evening walk. At home I was wearing my Native boots all day cause in the morning my feet were so cold. I usually only wear them at home (mostly because I love them so much and I want them to last for the next 20 years ...) but yesterday I didn´t want to change out of them. So I decided to also wear them on my walk to the sea.

I guess that´s why I remembered something I was reading a while ago:

"Walk slowly and carefully, place every step on the ground like you want to kiss Mother Earth with every step."

I love that!

When walking barefoot on the stones at the beach I already do exactly that. Placing every step carefully and fully attentional. Being aware of touching the stone with my toes and soles, connecting with nature, connecting with Mother Earth. 

So why not bringing this healing feeling into my every day´s walks? 

I tend to walk too fast even when I am taking a walk without needing to be somewhere at a certain time.

So yesterday I enjoyed every step in my Native boots, my toes where cozy warm and I felt a bit like a Native to tell the truth. 

No matter which direction I choose for my walks I usually always end up at my "living room" at the sea. My most favorite spot where I use to swim in summer and sit to watch out to the horizon in winter. There is a special stone formation where it is very comfortable to sit and read as well. Like sitting in a nice reading chair - only to have the most beautiful view directly onto the open sea. I love to be there in the dark as well. Sitting on the smooth stone, hearing the waves lapping onto the shore and watching the stars and the clouds above. That´s also the place where I usually scatter some tobacco to pray to Wakan Tanka, the Great Mystery, as my Lakota people call this Over All Energy, ... God, ... Universe, ... or how ever you wanna call IT. 

Shortly before I reached my spot yesterday I was a bit sad to not bring any tobacco with me at all. I had left for my walk with only my keys and a tissue in my pockets. But then I smiled because a heartwarming thought came up: 

Today I will show Wakan Tanka my beautiful boots. I will tell Him: "Look, Grandfather, today I came in the boots of my people to pray to you. Aren´t they not so very beautiful?"

And I already saw myself walking the stones of the beach and wiggling my feet to show Wakan Tanka how committed I am to the Native Americans and how happy I am by simply wearing those boots. I also already could see Wakan Tanka above, the wise Grandfather, leaning on his wooden walking stick and smiling at me. "Yes, Granddaughter, they are beautiful indeed. Wear them with pride and always let them warm your heart and your Native soul."

That, you beautiful souls out there, is the inner world of a Highly Sensitive Person. 

I do not need action movies, I do not need a huge crowd of people, shopping malls or any other entertaining industry because I carry my own entertaining industry within me - all the time!

So yesterday evening I slowly walked along the promenade to my most favorite spot at the sea. My toes were super warm and I felt really happy and relaxed. I was looking forward to my first visit at the sea in 2022 to talk to Wakan Tanka and to Universe. I was looking forward to watch the stars and to hear the sound of the waves, while totally connecting with nature and Mother Earth. 

When I stepped onto the stony beach I cheered inwardly because there were no other people around. Not because I don´t like other people but because I easily get distracted by their chats or loud music. I wanted to enjoy that moment without any distraction. 

The night sky was magical. The formation of the clouds was spectacular, though above me there was a cloud-free square where a lot of stars were already sparkling. 

I was heading straight to my most favorite spot right next to the water line.

When all of a sudden and right in front of me a beautiful shooting star appeared in the sky.    

Stunned I stopped in my track. My mouth popped open. 

It was such a magical moment. My whole body was reacting to it! 

And my first thought was:

"Grandfather. You came to greet me first! You came to welcome me before I even had the chance to show you my boots." 

Grandfather came to greet me first ... ! 

I embrace those stunning moments with all of my heart and all of my soul!

And in 2022, my "model-year", I will be even more open for those magical moments. Because they happen always and everywhere. We only have to open our hearts for them to be recognized. No matter what happens around us, no matter what will happen tomorrow ... in those special moments there is nothing but pure joy and pure universal love! 

 

I also will collect and share those moments with you.

Why?

Because the ability to live and relive those special moments is the big blessing of being a HSP. 

I don´t want you to wear Native boots and to watch out for shooting stars ... I want to inspire you to find and to enjoy your very own inner world. 

In daily life it is so easy to get distracted and frustrated by all the "bad things" around us. If we let it happen this huge amount of negativity controls our life. 

When you start to enjoy your inner world, when you listen to your heart and to your soul ... you will find your inner truth. You will find the beauty of the Universe and you will be connected to that beautiful All Over Energy through your passion for life. 

No matter what your passion is! No matter what your heart and your soul is yearning for! 

GO FOR IT!

Before, when I was younger and didn´t know myself that well, I felt like a dreamer all of the time. 

While people around me were mourning about the injustices of the world, I lived in my pale pink cloud of cotton candy instead. 

I didn´t yet know why I was so cozy in my own world but I knew it felt so much better than the grey "reality" that was painted by the majority of society.

Only after years and years of searching for my truth I got aware of the real Reality. 

Those special moments, those "dreams" are my real Reality!

That´s my personal way to connect with Universe, with the All Over Energy. 

And it is in that highest mood that I find my path, my solutions for my life! 

I often hear:

But I don´t know my passion.

I don´t know what really makes me happy. 

Well, sit down, be quiet and completely still, take a deep breath and listen to your heart and to your soul. 

You DO KNOW what makes you happy. It is within you. 

We only forgot to remember and we gave up to listen to our inner voice in exchange to listen to all those distracting voices out there.

I guess we even are afraid to see our inner world sometimes. We are afraid that it might be boring or stale. We are afraid of all those stored pains and fears to come up. How much easier is it to be distracted by the outside world instead of watching what is going on in our very deepest inside? 

But here is the thing:

1. you are aware of all those pains and fears - they are there, even when you don´t want to remember them clearly. They are showing up in your dreams or in unexpected emotions and situations ... until you face the music and release the pains.

2. Your inner world NEVER can be boring or stale! You are a creation of the All Over Energy! You are a perfect soul on a mission of life. Boring and stale doesn´t go with that. 

Open up to your inner world! 

Listen to your heart and to your soul!

Live your passion!

Live your dreams!

It is so worth it!!

Believe a Highly Sensitive Person who did and does exactly that for most of her life!

I hope I am able to prove it to you in my stories ... 

THANK YOU, UNIVERSE!

PILAMAYAYE WAKAN TANKA!